For reals? What a sucky, illogical (not to mention evil and expensive) plan.
Gabe Watson, the mysterious scuba-diving ‘Honeymoon killer’ is back at home in the States (I was going to say 'safely' but Alabama prosecutors are still chasing a life sentence), applying for bail, and now we hear about the gruesome and sad story of a British couple honeymooning in South Africa, where the kidnapping and murder of the wife was allegedly arranged by the husband.
This is a very sensitive issue and by no means do I wish to make light of murder or manslaughter or ‘random organized’ carjacking, but really people, why?
It appears that the husbands in these situations have put more time and effort into murder preparation than choosing table runners, photographers and corsages. These women thought they were marrying the men of their dreams, but instead they got Dexter… and bad versions of Dexter at that.
To kill a spouse or have a spouse killed is pretty heavy. Logic says instead of murdering your betrothed why not just break up with her? Ditch her before the wedding? Leave town? Write a note? Send her a text? With the average wedding costing over $25,000, if monetary gain was their driving force then perhaps choosing to not spend a quarter of grand on a one day party would be the best option? Indeed if it’s about money, why not steal her car, sell her jewellery on eBay and empty her bank accounts? It’s still not very nice but…
My ex broke up with me five weeks before our wedding, and I’m grateful that he chose to do this instead of have me taken care of, although if his wedding preparation contribution was any indication he probably would have buggered that up as well, and it was in Hobart so good luck finding a hit man.
I can see why they wanted to go through with the weddings. Deposits are hard to get back. Cancellation fees are hefty (trust me, I know) and let’s face it, weddings are really fun! You get to see your family and friends, dress up real nice, drink, party and dance… they are joyful events because, you know, most of the couples are looking forward to spending the rest of their lives together, or at least a couple of years, before you realize you are in love with a co-worker or the lady from the day care centre and take off with them.
But imagine if you were one of these blokes (or sheilas?!) who knew that by the time the honeymoon was over, they would be a widow? It takes fake smiling in the wedding photographs to a whole other level and poses many questions. Did they still go through the ‘happy couple’ motions, carrying their ladies over the threshold and shagging on the wedding night? Did they buy supersavers or refundable plane tickets for the honeymoon? Do they have a conscience?
Gee whiz, breaking up is uncomfortable, nasty and yucky but certainly not as bad as having to face your new wife’s grieving family and friends at her funeral two weeks after witnessing the 'happiest day of her life’.